I'm Jonathan, I'm twenty one, and I'm having a mad, passionate affair with every book I've ever read.

‘So careful of the type?’ but no.
From scarped cliff and quarried stone
She cries, ‘A thousand types are gone:
I care for nothing, all shall go.

‘Thou makest thine appeal to me:
I bring to life, I bring to death:
The spirit does but mean the breath:
I know no more.’ And he, shall he,

Man, her last work, who seem’d so fair,
Such splendid purpose in his eyes,
Who roll’d the psalm to wintry skies,
Who built him fanes of fruitless prayer,

Who trusted God was love indeed
And love Creation’s final law –
Tho’ Nature, red in tooth and claw
With ravine, shriek’d against his creed –

Who loved, who suffer’d countless ills,
Who battled for the True, the Just,
Be blown about the desert dust,
Or seal’d within the iron hills?

No more? A monster then, a dream,
A discord. Dragons of the prime,
That tare each other in their slime,
Were mellow music match’d with him.

O life as futile, then, as frail!
O for thy voice to soothe and bless!
What hope of answer, or redress?
Behind the veil, behind the veil.


- Alfred Lord Tennyson, In Memoriam, A. H. H., Canto LVI, 1850 

I went out for drinks on Thursday night, barely drank the amount it would usually take me to get drunk, and spent literally all of today sweating out, crying and vomiting on the bathroom floor. 

And now I leave for London in five and half hours, the house is a state, I’ve not packed up any of my things and I am hairy as hell. And I still feel sick. 

It’s hard to work out how much money you “have” when you’ve spent months dealing in negative figures. 

artmastered asked: Hi Jonathan, I had a read of your Virginia Woolf NPG exhibition review (you posted about it in a comment on my own review!) Really fantastic stuff! I, too, loved the engagement note to Lytton Strachey. I wish there'd been more little gems like that that gave a glimpse of Virginia's character. Helen

Thank you Helen, it means a lot to me that you read it! Yes, I really enjoyed the little quips they included in the exhibition that I really feel sum up the character of a writer that is often misconstrued as being entirely morose and suicidal. She had such a habit for humour and gaiety that is upsettingly overlooked a lot. And thank you very much for the follow! Your blog is absolutely wonderful (as you’ve probably garnered from the likes!) 

For anyone else who would like it read it, here is my review of the National Portrait Gallery’s exhibition, ‘Virginia Woolf: Art, Life, and Vision’. 

" The most important thing is not to think very much about oneself. To investigate candidly the charge; but not fussily, not very anxiously. On no account to retaliate by going to the other extreme — thinking too much. "
Virginia Woolf, A Writer’s Diary

(Source: thewreckageofmen)